---{ A WHIRRING TELETYPE CHIRPS, SPEWING FORMFEED INTO THE PILE }---

 
UNCLAS
MSGID/SITREP/9TH CYB DIV//
UNIT/KIWICON RESERVE REAR INTEL GRP//
PERID/120915:0000Z/TO:111215:0000Z//
HEADING/TITLE//
AMPN/INTEL SITREP SUMMARY NEW ZEALAND CYBERWAR DAY 137//
HEADING/GENERAL//
AMPN/FORWARD EMPLACEMENTS REPORT CONTINUING ENGAGEMENT
WITH ENEMY. 3 X SORTIES OF 8 X SU-25 FROGFOOT CONDUCTED
GND ATTACKS WITH TCP SYN/FIN ON PORT 7199. JMX CONSOLE 
TOOK HEAVY CASUALTIES, ACTING CO RPTS OPERATIONAL 
READINESS AT 40%, LOAD AVG 18.7. WOUNDED EVACED TO DEV
SHM, AWAITING ONWARD TRANSPORT. RECCE REPORTS ENEMY 
RESUPPLY CONVOY MAPREF PAPA-ZULU WITH BMP-24BIT MECH 
INF DIVISION STRENGTH, B-HAWK MANPAD UNITS, PDF MINELAYERS.//
HEADING/COMMANDER EVALUATION//
AMPN/ FURTHER ATTACKS ON DUG IN POSITIONS AT MAPREF
XRAY-PAPA. SIGNIFICANT ESCALATION OF CYBERING EXPECTED.
RECOMMEND IMMEDIATE REINFORCEMENT FROM CYBER RESERVE//

---------------------{ SOME TIME LATER ... }---------------------

KIWICON 2015

SELECTIVE CYBER SERVICE | CALL FOR CYBER PAPERS

We hereby notify you that by this notice published on the Internet pursuant to the some fictitious regulations, you have been called up for service with the Kiwicon Cyber Expeditionary Force, as a Reservist of the Ninth Division of the General Hacker Reserve, Kiwicon Cyber Corps.

You are hereby and forthwith directed to present your response to the Kiwicon 9 CFP by filing your report on this page. Each talk and/or training submission should be made on a separate form. They must be filed individually, and upsetting the file clerks is never a good idea this early in campaign season. The first round of talks, correction: CYBER WARFIGHTER EDUCATIONAL MATERIALS will be announced on the 26th of October, NZDT, and will be complete by the 9th of November, NZDT.

If the evaluation board passes you as fit for service, you will be required to present yourself to the St James Theatre of Cyberwar for the dissemination of the aforementioned material. You will be notified in due course by an authorized officer of the Crue regarding your particular time and place for reporting. Practical training will be held on the 9th of December, 2015, while presentations will be given on the 10th and 11th of December.

Note: it is the responsibility of the instructor to ensure all material has been appropriately declassified.

You are also hereby further notified that if you fail to obey this order you are liable to be considered sensible without further notice.

God save the Mince Queen,

Col. St. John Beauchamp-Beauclerk
(Adjutant Crue)

IMPORTANT NOTICES

(read each paragraph carefully)

If you report pursuant to this order please fill out our google form (triplicate copies not required at this time) at https://goo.gl/JnoCb3. Answer the questions to the best of your ability, and let us know if you have any special requirements (motorcycles, pyrotechnics, therapy animals, exorcisms).

Should floods, illness, fires, and poorly scheduled wedding ceremonies unavoidably prevent you from reporting as ordered above, you must write immediately to the Adjutant Crue stating the circumstances which prevent you from reporting. As per special order, written notes from Lord Tuskington will also be accepted.

If you are employed, you should inform your employer of this order and that the examination is merely to determine if you may be fit for service. If found suitable for induction, documentation will be provided by an authorized officer of the Crue for your employer as early as possible.

Troop movements to the marshaling point are the fiduciary responsibility of the cyber warfighter and will not be reimbursed regardless of evaluation board determination.

To re-familiarise yourself with your duties as Cyber Reserve, please review the Standard Operating Procedure with particular observation to the sections relevant to the ongoing conflict, viz;

  • Cybering
  • Computering
  • Minced meats
  • Cyber hacking
  • Computer cyber hacking
  • Hacking (cyber)
  • Cyber hoodies, correct wear and maintenance of,
  • Cyber warring

Any further communications arising from this notice must be sent by to kiwicon@kiwicon.org. IRC communications cannot be accepted due to our ongoing lack of ability to remember to tell everyone else that they happened.